How to add grace to your work and reach your goals.
I love to work and I believe that I’m made to work but juggling working when you have a child at home is akin to holding a wriggly fish without dropping it. It doesn’t look very graceful.
I realised very early on this blogging journey that it would be a huge juggle to work on this blog and look after my kids effectively, read BLOGGING A FULL TIME JOB? and 10 TIPS ON HOW TO BE A BETTER BLOGGER to get an idea of the hours needed to pursue a career in blogging.
As an ex-procrastinator, I could (and did) make up excuses why I can’t do it all. Yes I could have worked harder and I want to work harder. However, blogging when the baby is napping, early in the morning and late into the night; it made me very tired. I know myself very well, I find it hard to switch between my ‘Mum’ head and ‘blogger’ head. I get so ‘into the zone’ when I blog and when you have small kids at home, your zone needs to be on them. It was starting to ‘cost’ too much both in terms of energy and time, I was making myself ill plus I wasn’t being paid to do it, so something had to give. I only have the energy to do one job well, you can guess which job won out the day.
The season to work hadn’t arrived yet. I knew that the years looking after the children full time would be short in the big scheme of things.
In the procrastinating days I would have given up blogging altogether, and I’ve come too far in my journey to give up. During my stay at home years I learnt a very important thing, the graceful words ‘no guilt’. These words have been a total game-changer to me on so many levels and in so many aspects of my life.
When my head was spinning with too much to do…. ‘no guilt’.
When I felt rejected or ignored….’no guilt’.
When I felt like I was failing as a blogger…. ‘no guilt, move on’.
When I felt I was failing as a Mum ‘feel the feeling, name it, then let it go, no guilt’.
Can you sense how freeing that is? To give yourself grace; grace to make mistakes, to feel exhausted, to feel like you can’t go on, to FEEL ALL THE FEELS and no guilt? Today is a brand new day people, and I am a brand new person.
3 SIMPLE RULES FOR GRACE-FULL WORK
1. NO GUILT
You’ve guessed it the top spot goes to ‘no guilt’.
We all make mistakes, we all get tired and get brain ache, we all run around in circles sometimes, we all go upstairs only to forget what we went up there for (just me?).
Holding onto negatives without affirming yourself with positives means you end up in the negative all the time. The tiredness will filter into the next day and then the next. That’s down to feeling guilty and ain’t nobody got time for that!
2. THE GIFT OF TIME
Procrastinator’s think that tasks take longer than they should. Therefore the right amount of time is not allocated to the task, then when the task doesn’t get done in time?
GUILT, GUILT, GUILT.
I mean how rubbish are you anyway that you can’t do one simple task right? WRONG.
Give yourself a gift and allocate the right amount of time to the task. Time to get out of the door in the morning, time to go through your e-mails and time to do the housework and after you’ve successfully and grace-fully done each task give yourself a BIG pat on the back. You deserve it because you’re awesome. Clearly.
3. WRITE DOWN YOUR PRIORITIES
When you have a gazillion things whirring round your head it’s hard to keep on top of the jobs at hand. Anyone would struggle.
Work out what you can do and when you can do it, only you know yourself what works for you. You might surprise yourself and achieve more than you thought, or not (see no guilt!).
Make a list. If it changes, make amendments or make another list. WRITE DOWN YOUR PRIORITIES.
The working day can be set in stone if you want, but in my experience work life just doesn’t work that way. I used to get so frustrated when working on a task only to be interrupted by my boss trumping my task with a more urgent report.
Remember friends, priorities, like clouds, are ever shifting and moving and we need to move with them not against them.
Frustration and impatience are the opposite of efficiency and calmness. Writing a list will enable you to go back and finish the other task later, when you have time!
A NEW SEASON
My son has recently started school and my daughter now goes to nursery a whole day a week. I could choose to make it Costa time (Katie Hopkins promised me it would be and man do I deserve it), but I’m a worker, and a worker’s gotta work.
My priorities in regards to ‘family first’ will never change and neither should they. I will always be the one to take my kids to school and pick them up again. I will always be the one that tucks them in and reads them stories, AND I’m also a blogger, a writer, an editor for two blogs and in order to be good at these jobs it’s time to take up a more efficient and grace-full way of working.
Do you know when you work at your best? How do you prioritise your work? Do you work from home? I’d love to hear your thoughts about it in the comments.
Until the next time friends, have a great grace-full day!
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