Whether you’re a parent or not, I believe all women are home makers.
I believe that the atmosphere we create in our homes ripples out into the rest of the world. Our ‘homes’ can be our shops, stores, pig pen at work, or our physical shelters.
When I was working full time I was still a home maker, and when I was living on my own in my one bed flat I was still a home maker.
IT TAKES A VILLAGE
Mother Teresa wasn’t mistaken when she said the words “If you want to change the world, go home and love your family”. I don’t think she was just talking about mothers with children, but whatever family looks like to you.
They say it takes a village to raise a child, but I think we forget that we are all children. We’re all connected and made to look after each other.
I don’t think it’s a mistake that I sometimes feel lonely when I am surrounded by people who love me; I believe I’m feeling the loneliness pangs of someone else and that when I choose to reach out to someone who is lonely I help to heal the world. Those pangs are the universe telling me to take action.
I also don’t think we need to have birthed a child to be a mother. We are all connected by our common humanity and I think mothering is in every woman naturally. I know that I have been mothered by so many women through my life; whether they were a teacher at my school or a kindness from a stranger in a shop when I was struggling with my children in tow.
In our homes we have choices that we don’t have out in the world at large. And I think the choices we have in our home ripple out into the world at large. We can choose how to welcome people in and we can choose our own rules.
I strongly believe that how we treat people in our own homes has a massive effect on communities and individuals.
Hospitality v Entertaining
As a family me and Jon have chosen to welcome in strangers and practice hospitality. Hospitality is not the same as entertaining. Biblical hospitality can be as simple as offering someone a glass of water and entertaining is a party or event, big or small. I think that’s a huge difference.
I have been to places where I thought I would be the recipient of hospitality only to realise it was entertaining, sometimes this has been church, which left me feeling decidedly unloved and unwelcome.
Have you ever walked into a room expecting a warm hug and instead experienced the cold shoulder? It’s always a shock to me when this happens, especially when I’ve been invited specifically.
In blogging too, it can seem like events are super fun and inclusive but that hasn’t always been the case in my experience, even in my niche of Somerset.
CREATE THE ATMOSPHERE
In our homes we can create the atmosphere we want, I have learnt the hard way that I cannot control the atmosphere in other places or created by others, and I can control my own reactions to situations which in turn can change the atmosphere. My honing in on my gut instinct means I can choose to stay or go. I can choose to be a thermometer (simply registering the temp of the room) or I can be a thermostat, a person who sets the warmth in the room and pray that others come up to that warmth or cools down if tensions are high.
I know I can change the atmosphere wherever I am by choosing to be positive and see the best in others. However, I also know i cannot change other people. That is their choice only.